This
is the story of the best date I ever had. At the time, I was
forty-two, and living in Summerdale, Alabama. I was working a dirt
job (creating a neighborhood,) in Semi-Nole, Alabama, right on the
Stix river, right up against Florida. Being forty-two, I had dated a
number of women in my life, but never married. So I’m an old
bachelor living in Summerdale, in what used to be a grain silo,
somebody had turned into apartments.
This
dirt job, was one of the more interesting thing I ever did, is yet
another story. Over from my silo about three block lived a women
named Judy. She was a handsome women, Blonde, she stood about 5’10”
and was built just like a women ought to be. She was divorced and had
twin girls who were ten. They looked just like mother, a little tall
for ten, long blonde hair and bubbling with energy. Now when I say
they are twins, I mean identical. They looked exactly alike, it was
uncanny.
Well
as time went on, I thought it a good idea to make eyes at Judy, I
being a man, she’s being a women and all that. Don’t really
remember how it happened, but it seems I got the twins instead. Every
time I turned around, there they were. Well After a few days of this,
I found I could tell them apart (their voices were slightly
different,) and started addressing them by name, Tiffany and
Stephanie.
Well
this thew ‘em, nobody could tell them apart but mother. Nobody, not
their teachers, not their friends, not the doctor, not even their
father could tell them apart. This created a special kind of a bond
between us, because after I could tell them apart, I couldn’t get
rid of them.
Now
out on the dirt job, I was working for this fellow who had a dream.
He had 600 acres on Stix River there at Semi-Nole, and we were
creating a neighborhood with all lots waterfront from raw land. His
name was John, and his job was to create salable lots, and his wife
Ginger, had a real estate business in Pensacola, Florida, were she
was selling the lots. They had three kids, two boys, who’s names I
cannot recall, and a 12 year old daughter, Katy. Katy was tall for
her age and also a blonde. The reason I know Katy, is in the
summertime, everyday about noon, Katy would show up with a picnic
basket, where ever we were on the job and her and her dad, John,
would have a picnic. The dirt job and their home was within walking
distance, and she walked out there everyday. Of course myself and the
other fellers had our own lunch. But I thought that very nice.
So….
With this thought in my head, I ask the Twins if they’d like to go
on a picnic. What I heard back was, “We want to go to the beach, we
hear it’s just down the roads a ways.” And so it was, Summerdale
was about 25 miles from the beach, indeed Gulf Shores, Alabama, sugar
white sand and emerald green water.
“You’ve
never been to the beach?” I ask. ‘No’ is what I heard. This is
when I hung myself trying to dismiss this idea. “Well, we would
have ask your mother you know. This is a mother thing, She has to say
okay, or go with us.” Zoom………… they were gone so fast I
didn’t get in another word. About 15 minutes later, here they come.
“Mama’s
gonna call.” They were breathing hard from all the running. Well
Judy called, wanted to know who was going, where we were going and
when would we be back. Well I was stuck, I could see that.
“Well…..
Just us. How about early Saturday morning. We’ll go down to Gulf
Shores and come back when it gets hot. Let’s say around one or
two.” Judy just said, “okay...that would be fine.”
Well,
we did just that, we went down to the beach and had us a picnic, they
played in the water screaming bloody murder the whole time. To say
the least, it wore their little asses out and they slept all the way
home.
About
a week after the beach excursion, they wanted to know if I would
baby-sit them. ‘bout that time Judy called and wanted me to
baby-sit them for the evening. “They like you.” Humm… well
after that, seems I became their regular baby-sitter. Who knew?
To
say the least, I got to know the twins pretty well. They were
fascinating creatures and they were identical. Stephanie was the
spokes person, Tiffany was the quiet one, if you could say that. They
would try to trick me on who was who, but I always got it right
(although I never told them how I knew), and that fascinated them.
They were so identical, and so much alike that I wondered how they
would ever date or marry. How anyone could ever separate them or
come between them, I can’t imagine. They were tight. You would have
to marry them both, as to not come between them.
Well
time moves on, and autumn comes around and I’m still moving dirt.
Haven’t seen Katy lately because school is back in session. But I
notice the Sager Theater in Pensacola was advertising a live
performance of ‘Grease.’ So I think to myself, ‘Self,’ the
twins would love this, this would be a good experience for them, and
I’d like to see it to boot.
So
I made a plan, I ask Judy about it and she said okay…. So the play
was in about a month and a half, I was working everyday, so getting
tickets wasn’t going to be easy. Well Ginger had an office right
downtown Pensacola, so I went to their house to ask Ginger if she
would get me tickets, I told her about the twins and what my plan
was. I was going to take them to dinner and a play.
I
want you know, that women looked at me real hard, “How old are
they?” she ask. ‘Ten’ I replied. She looked at me up and down,
I could tell it was a study. After a few moments she smiled and said,
“On one condition.” ‘Okay.’ I replied. “You take Katy too.”
Ginger went on, “You’re right, it is a good experience, and I’d
like you to take Katy as well.” ‘Okay.’ Seems I suddenly had a
date with three little blonde girls.
Well
I told the twins my plan and of course they were thrilled with the
idea, dinner and a play, but I don’t really think they realized
just what I was telling them, they were just trilled to be going
somewhere.
There
was a flea market down the road just a few blocks and I was over
there having a look. Well there were a couple of used bikes there and
it occurred to me, I’d never seen them on a bike. So…. I bought
them and took ‘em home and cleaned them up.
The
next time they showed up, there were the bikes. “Who are the bikes
for?” I heard. They knew, I knew they knew. ‘They’re yours.’
Well that made their day, They were on the bikes and off to show
their mother. I walked down to their house to tell their mother and
except any flack.
Well
here come Tiffany down one street, and Stephanie down the other,
(Judy lived on a corner) and they meet right in the middle of the
corner, Crash, Boom. Splat it was. They crumbled into a heap, and
then up they jumped, crying their eyes out running for the house,
right passed me, right to mama (told me were I stood.)
“We
crashed..!!!” I heard from the house, then silence, then I heard,
“You’re alright, you’re alright, you’re both are going live.”
Just like that, the screen door flung open, and out they came headed
right for the bikes, they got right back on them, and off they went.
They just needed mother to tell them they were alright. As for me, I
didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, it all happened so fast.
Being
Autumn, the school was going to have their open house, and they ask
me to come meet their teachers. I told them that’s a mom and dad
thing, they should ask them. They told me they did, and mom had a
date and dad didn’t want to. So I took them to open house, and met
their teachers.
Well
it seems their teachers were pleased with them, “She’s a good
girl, doesn’t give me any trouble, but sometimes, she just don’t
seem right, like she’s somebody else.” Seems both teachers told
me pretty much the same thing, so I got them both out in the hall,
and ask them.
“Are
you swapping classes.?” They both looked at the floor, so I knew,
“you’re confusing your teachers.”
They
both looked up and said, “But its fun.” and about that time one
of their teachers came out in the hall….(?) Looked at me, looked at
them, looked at me again.
“So
there’s two of them?” she said with a bit of surprize. I smiled,
and nodded my head, “Well you know that explains a lot.” she said
rather sternly, “now I know what I’m dealing with.” I had to
laugh inside, these two girls really had their teachers going…..
But now the jig was up.
“Well
girls, seems you’ve been caught, better watch your p’s and q’s
cause they’re going to be watching you.” They hung their heads,
but they were grinning.
Well
Ginger had gotten me the tickets, and I could tell she had chipped in
a bit cause we had four seats, third row center, you could spit on
the orchestra.
Well
the big day came, and I must say, I was a little nervous. I was
fixing to have three little girls on my hands, with no buffer.
You
know, in case something girl happened, that men don’t really know
about or know how to handle, the buffer was always, Judy’s just
down the block.
All
kinds of shit went through my head that hadn’t to this point. Well
I was stuck, I had a date and I had to keep it.
Gettin’
on toward time, I walked down to Judy’s to see what’s up. Tiffany
& Stephanie were playing baseball and dirty head to toe. I told
them they’d better start getting ready and they said, “We ain’t
goin’, we’re playing baseball.”
Well
that just set me off, “The hell you’re not,” and I grab them
both by the hair and headed for there house, them screaming and
kicking the whole way, I marched them inside, and Judy stood up and
ask, “What did they do now?”
I
said, “The play, they need to get ready for the play.”
“The
play, the play, that’s right.” Judy replied, I still had them by
the hair on their toes. “I told you girls not to get dirty, Now
look at you.” She stepped over, and took them from me, by the hair,
gave ‘em a good shake and led them off to the bathroom,
yel...telling them, “Ya’ll get in tub right now.”
I
thought it a good time to exit stage left. “I’ll be back in an
hour,” So I scooted on out there. I went on to my silo and took a
shower and got ready myself. I was thinking, hell, you done yelled at
them, dragged them home by the hair, got them in trouble with mother,
they aren’t to be in a very good mood.
Well
I got in the car (4-door sedan) and drove on down there, parked in
the drive and went up to the door, thinking they aren’t going to be
mad. I knock on the door, and Judy said, “come in.”
There
they were, the three of them, Tiffany & Stephanie were looking
the part. They where clean as a whistle, their hair was done and they
were wearing matching white lace dresses. Mother had put a little
make up on them. Tiffany had a blue sash gathered around her waist
with a bow in the back, and a blue bow in her hair. Stephanie had a
pink sash gathered around her waist with a bow in the back, and a
pink bow in her hair. They were just beautiful. They were so lovely,
it gave me a bit of a chill. And they were smiling.
“Tiffany’s
blue and Stephanie’s pink, I did that so you could tell’em apart,
and so the other girl can tell’em apart.” Judy pointed out. Then
she went on, “I know you can tell the apart, they told me, but
sometimes when they are quiet, it’s hard.” This told me, she used
their voices too.
I
put my arms out, and just like that, I had a beautiful girl on each
arm, a many a feller’s dream, and they where laughing and giggling.
I was sooo… relieved. I put them in the back seat, told them we
would pick up Katy and ya’ll a ride together.
“Who’s
Katy.” “Where are we going to eat?” “When are we going to get
there.” “How old is Katy?” “What’s the play about?”
“Who’s in it?” “How fast can this car go?” “Is this an
old car?” “How old are you?” “So you run a tractor?” “When
are we going to get there?” All the way to Katy’s, I had to
marvel.
After
about thirty minutes of the third degree we arrived at Katy’s. Now
keep in mind who Katy is, She’s the bosses daughter, the boss that
pays me good money for the work I do. She’s twelve, I’m taking
her out. Now I don’t really know Katy, she’s the ‘picnic girl’,
she’s the bosses daughter. So my relationship with her is cold.
I
pull up into the drive, told the twins to stay put, and I went up and
knocked on the door. It opens up and there were the three of them.
Mom, Dad and Katy. Katy looked the part, She too was wearing a lace
white dress with a yellow sash around her waist, with a bow in the
back and a yellow bow in her hair, which she had done up and her
mother had put a little make up on her, she was beautiful. (made me
wonder if there weren’t going’s on, behind the scenes, I wasn’t
privy to.)
John
said, “you drive safe, this is my little girl.” and he put out
his hand, and as I shook his hand, he had slipped me a fifty dollar
bill, “Take them somewhere nice for dinner.” I slipped the bill
into my pocket, and Ginger motioned for me to offer my arm, So I put
my arm out, and Katy took it and I escorted her out to the car and
open the door, and she got in with the twins. At this point, I’m a
nervous wreck, but I’m the man in charge, so I have to be, ‘the
man in charge.’
So
off to Pensacola we go. Thinking my relationship with Katy was cold,
well not for long. She had all the same questions, “When are we
going to get there?” “How Old are you?” How fast can this car
go?” “Where are we going to eat?” “What’s the play about?”
After a little while they settled down and began talking to each
other, ‘bout school and stuff.
I
took them to a nice seafood restaurant over by the Cordova Mall, I
don’t recall the name, but it was nice. I parked and got out and
opened the door for them, and they all pile out and in we went. The
Maitra d meet us at the door, and looked us over real good, and ask,
“What’s the occasion?”
They
blurted out, “Dinner and play.”
I
nodded, and he said, “Well very good, which play?”
“Grease.”
rang out.
“Good
Choice,” he said, “I’m glad you chose us for dinner.” he
picked up 4 menus, bowed and sung out his arm to show us the way,
“Your table awaits you.” The girls were trilled, I could tell, as
we were escorted to our table. We all sat down as the Maitra d held
the chair for each girl, and myself. This was a fancy place. And they
were tickled, they felt like somebody. “Your waiter will be along
shortly, enjoy your meal.” The girls were just a chatter.
Moments
later the waiter arrived, brought each of us a glass of water and
ask, “Aren’t we a fine looking bunch of young ladies, what’s
the occasion?”
Again
they all chimed in, “Dinner and a play.”
“Well
how nice.” He looked at me, “and you’re the lucky fellow?”
I
nodded. “Yea, I’m the lucky fellow.” smiling, I guess I was.
“Well
I’m glad you chose us for your dinner, what may I bring you.” The
waiter said as he prepared to write.
I
said, “we’ll start a straight tonic and they will each have a
Shirley Temple.”
“Very
good sir, I shall return.” and the waiter was off. The girls were
trembling with excitement, their heads craning all around taking it
all in.
The
place was made up like an old fishing shack, so there were lots of
antiques around, old fishing nets, glass floats and a large aquarium
on one wall.
They
spent a good bit of time gawking at the fish. Well dinner Came and
they sat down again, and the waiter tied a napkins round each one’s
neck we had a real nice dinner, with dinner conversation. Mostly
about school, how the twins fool their teachers, how Katy’s in Jr.
High, and has a different teacher for each class. So there was plenty
to discuss.
When
dinner was done, I paid the check and took care of the staff, we got
up to go, and waiter came over and said, “Never have I waited on
such beautiful ladies. Ya have a good time at the play, and come back
to see us.” The girls just beamed.
On
our way out, The Maitra d said, “Such beautiful ladies”, and he
kissed his fingers in sign of affection, “I would be honored if you
should come see us again.” They beamed, they beamed so much they
needed a lampshade, and they were beaming and grinning and giggling
all the way to the Theater.
As
we went into the theater, I had them lined up in front of me, as we
climbed the few steps, Stephanie stopped and pointed to the ticket
line, “Don’t we need a ticket?” She asked.
I
smiled and said, “no,” as I reach into my coat pocket and pulled
out the tickets, “They know we’re coming.”
“Wow,”
she replied.
And
Katy said, “My mother told them we were coming.”
“That
right.” I so agreed. This, for some reason really impressed the
twins…
Their
eyes grew big, and they looked at each, took each others hands and
squealed, while jumping up & down, singing, “They know we’re
coming, they know we’re coming” Well this bumped Katy up a notch,
cause it was her mother that told them we were coming.
We
went on in and I handed the tickets to the usher, while the girls
heads were craning all about taking it all in. The usher looked at me
real hard…Looked at the tickets, and looked at the girls and then
look at me again, and said, “That’s a peck a pretty girls you got
there, you’re a lucky fellow.”
“Yes
I am.” I was beaming now. Then he bowed, sung out his arm to show
us to our seats, and the girls started giggling again. We went down
to third row center and there were our seats. After we sat down, I
began to think the reason usher looked at us so hard was, we had the
best seats in the house. He must have thought we were somebody. And
so we were… Katy’s mother had arranged this. The first two rows
in front of us, were really too low, the third row was even with the
stage, and if you glance down, there was the orchestra. I don’t
think there were better seats, we had ‘em.
Not
much to say here. For the next two hours those girls, all three of
them were on the edge of their seats, with their mouths hanging open,
they were blown away. They didn’t say a word the entire play, not
once, Not once! I repeat myself, did they lean back in their seats.
They were mesmerized.
I
pretty much missed the play (Although it was real good, they did a
good job,) I was busy watching them. What delightful flowers they
were. I was feeling rather pleased, because I could plainly
see...they were pleased, all three of them.
When
it was over, the chattering started, their heads were chocked full of
fresh information and they were hashing it out. I walked them out to
the parking lot and put them in the car. I didn’t have to say
anything, they were saying it all.
As
we pulled out of the parking lot, the cast from the play was crossing
the street to their hotel, all three of the girls were hanging out
the windows, yelling about how good it was, and we love you and the
like.
Then
back to chattering as they made sense out of what they saw. I want
you to know, Pensacola isn’t that big, but before I could get out
of town, they were all three sound asleep. Sawing logs.
When
we got to Katy’s, she might have well been dead, I scooped her up
in my arms and walked up to the door. I knocked (actually rang the
bell,) and Ginger opened the door. There was a staircase right
behind her, she turn and pointed up the stairs, then headed up the
stairs herself. Well I knew what that meant, so I carried Katy right
on up the stairs to her room and put in her bed.
On
the way down the stairs Ginger said, “I’m glad it went well.”
A
wee bit surprized, I replied, “How do you know it went well?”
Ginger
smiled, “I’m her mother. I know. She is sound asleep, she won’t
remember coming home, or being carried up the stairs. She feels
perfectly safe, Sooo….it went well.”
“Well
it did,” I agreed, “she was a delight, between them all, it was
delightful, I could not have had a better evening, by the way, the
other two are asleep in the car.”
“I
figured.” Ginger said, then she grab me by the shoulders, and gave
me a hug, and said, “Good job.” It was all I could do to not
cry. I was really overwhelmed.
Well
I drove the twins on home, and alas, I had to carry both of them in,
and put them in bed. ‘I wish I could sleep like that.’
I
told Judy it went well, She said “I know.”
“Cause
they’re asleep?” I asked.
“Yep….”
And
that bring to a conclusion the best date I ever had.
Wasn’t
long after that, the job ended, we had built a neighborhood, and it
was time for me to move on to the next job. So that was the end of
the twins. Never knew what became of them.
After
years of reflection, it finally occurred to me, what they had done.
They had given me joy, and they did so in abundance. They had done,
exactly what God’s little girls are suppose to do, Bring joy into
the world. And they had done just that. May God Bless the three of
them.
George
Henry Nichols
September
2026